Lesson #52: Texas weather hates me.

I get the Air1 verse of the day emailed to me, and the one from Saturday was Psalm 97:11, "Light shines on the godly, and joy on those whose hearts are right." This week, instead of being negative towards others and selfish, let's focus on where our hearts are. On ourselves? No no no. They should be focused on God and on others. Let's let our lights shine! Then, we will have true joy.

Texas weather is too spastic and bipolar!

Lesson #51: Light, light, light up the sky...

I know it's been awhile, I apologize. This past week has been crazy for me. I am absolutely exhausted. Here's my thoughts for today. I was listening to Pandora and the song "Light Up the Sky" by the Afters came on. I've heard this song a million times. But today it just kind of spoke to me.

When stars are hiding in the clouds
I don’t feel them shining
When I can’t see beyond my doubt
The silver lining
When I’ve almost reached the end
Like a flood You’re rushing in
Love is rushing in

Light, light, light up the sky
Light up the sky to show me You are with me
I, I, I can’t deny
Oh I can’t deny that You are right here with me
You’ve opened my eyes so I can see You all around me

When I'm having a bad day, and I just want to curl up in a ball and give up, God reaches out to me and holds me in His arms. Just like in the song, He lights up the sky to show me that He IS there. That I don't need to give up. I love this song so much. I hear it almost everytime I turn Air1 on in my car, but I've never actually thought about the words. God has a way of telling us something that He wants us to know.

Lesson #50: Never forget.

I literally haven't stopped thinking about those Como kids. I didn't realize how much of an impact they made on not only myself, but everyone who went on the trip. God has a way of showing us what He wants for our lives. And this week, I learned that I need to be less selfish, that I need to stop thinking so much about myself and think about others. I was definitely humbled this week.

Never forget to live in the now. And never forget those moments that can change your life forever. God is amazing, and He has a plan for you. It's the little things that count the most.

Lesson #49: "You Como now!"

Day five. Last day. My emotions didn't hit me until just now. We left Como about 20 minutes ago, and I can't stop thinking about those kids. Physically, I am exhausted. It's a good exhausted though. I am tired and sore and worn out, but I would do it all over again in a heartbeat. Emotionally, I'm happy, sad, depressed, pumped, and content all at once. I'm homesick, I miss my family. But if I could do something like this every week, I would. These kids amaze me. I'm so sad because I don't want to leave these kids. Spiritually, I feel filled. My cup is just overflowing. The past few weeks, I've felt lower than empty. I've been running on E for a long time, I felt like I was going to run out of gas soon. Coming to Como and working with these kids just filled me up completely. I don't normally cry at these kinds of things, but I can't help crying, I haven't stopped thinking about these kids since we left. The way their faces lit up when we arrived everyday made me smile from ear to ear. Today we went to iT'S, which is like a Mr. Gatti's but 173 times cooler and bigger. (It was a little easier to keep an eye on them in the small confined space, unlike the museum.)

One kid who is really just on my heart is Malik. He wasn't there today, which resulted in me being even more depressed when I didn't get to say goodbye to him this afternoon. I didn't really get to know him until yesterday when he was in my group at the museum. I only really knew him for one day, yet he is the one who impacted me the most. When we got back to the CCC, we made capes, since we were "superheroes foe God" this week. He ran up to me holding his cape and said "Look Jenae! Look!" the cape said, "Malik and Jenae." And that's all. I only knew this kid for a day. I didn't realize that just talking to him and being with him would make such an impact... He was going around showing everyone his cape, and his little face just had the biggest smile on it. So while I was making mine, he says, "Jenae, can I write something on your cape?" I said sure, so he grabbed a marker and wrote, "I luve Jenae. -Malik."

I will never forget these kids. I will make it a priority to come back here and Spend a day or two with these kids. They remember our group from last summer, so it comforts me to know that they won't forget us. I have so many stories, but I'm sure you all will hear them eventually.

Thank you guys for following my blog this week. It was an amazing week that I will never forget.

Lesson #48: And alllllll that jazz.

Day four. Was. Awesome. We met the kids at the Fort Worth Science and History Museum at ten. We split up into groups, and Jaci and I had a group of 12 kids (Bad idea!!) while everyone else had about 2-5 kids. Talk about stressful! We eventually split into smaller groups, so I had 4 kids. But it was so much fun, I loved watching how excited and entertained they were by the smallest things! For those of you that know me, you know I love space and that kind of scientific thing, so it was really cool for me too! There were times when I couldn't actually enjoy the museum because I had to keep an eye on my group, but when we got to the space area, I was so excited. Sadly, though, we didn't have tickets for the show. But it's okay, I love just looking at pictures. I know, nerd. But it was a lot of fun! I'm pretty sure when we got back to hotel I CRASHED. This week has been so exhausting! But so amazing! I'm homesick, but I never want to leave these kids.

One kid in particular I really attached to today. His name is Malik. He was a handful, but he is absolutely adorable! He told me something today that just broke my heart. We were sitting outside the museum and leans over and says, "Jenae guess what. My grandmother died a year ago. She was killed. Somebody set her room on fire. I was walkin' into the house and I smelled smoke so I went into her room and called 811. (I'm guessing he meant 911.)" I couldn't believe how casually he told me this. He got a little teary-eyed, but he was so casual about it. I just wanted to cry, and sit there and hug him. I just can't believe that could happen. And it just breaks my heart more that he had to watch it and be the one who called 911. He's only 7 years old. When I was 7, I was worried about who was stealing my crayons. He has to worry about his family members surviving. It just breaks my heart. As we were leaving today, he told me that he wouldn't be there tomorrow because he has to go see his brother. That made me so sad because I probably won't ever get to see him again, unless we come back to Como. (which I really hope we do!) Malik is one of the sweetest kids I've met this whole trip. And I hate to leave him.

Tomorrow is our last day. I really cannot believe how quickly this week has gone by. I never want to leave these kids. They have made a huge impact on me. I know the reason we came here was to make an impact on them, but I think they've made a bigger impact on me. God has a way of helping us grow, and He knows what He's doing.

Right now we are sitting at Danny D's Barbecue singing karaoke. Sam, Jaci, Cassie and I sang some T-Swizzle and Evan is singing some Journey. We're bringing the house down!

Lesson #47: "You see these bags under my eyes?!!"

Day three of our mission trip was interesting to say the least. Our original plan was to finish VBS today. Buuuuuut the power went out and so we had to improvise. They took the kids outside while I and a few other people sat in the craft room cutting out the paper Goliaths (in the dark!) It was so much fun! The power outage lasted about an hour or so, and then we just played games until it was time to leave. My favorite memory today with the kids was the looks on the kids' faces when we were leaving and when we told them we were coming back. All I heard was, "You guys are coming back right?!" and "I can't wait to see you guys tomorrow!!" and just things like that. It made me smile to see how excited they were to know that we were coming back. These kids have been so amazing, and I really don't want Friday to be here.

After working with the kids, we went and relaxed at the hotel until we went to speedzone. That was a fun time. This was probably one of the best days I've had so far! And now Cassie, Jaci and I are going to make funny videos. These poor other hotel guests.

Lesson#46: "GET TANGLED UP IN JESUS!"

Day two of our time here with the Como kids was awesome. We started with some silly songs and then the Grouchy Rooster (Kyle) came and interrupted Matt! So Captain VBS (Trey) came and saved the day! My attempt to start the Captain VBS chant failed, but the kids made up their own, and Captain VBS still came! After the skit, we split into our different stations: crafts, silly songs, games, and skits. Ben, Rachel, Matt and I led silly songs. We found out that the older kids really aren't in to the whole 'silly song' thing. The younger kids got really into it, and it was so much fun! There was one girl in the older group, however, who finally got into it. We were singing "I'm All Wrapped Up" and there was one corner of girls who were just not doing it. So this girl goes up to the corner and says "Guys! Do it! Get tangled up in JESUS! Come on!" That was just cool to watch, because she was one of the people who, at the beginning of the time together, didn't want to do anything. So after our first session of VBS, we went rollerskating with them. That was a crazy time, let me tell you! Our group wasn't the only one there, so it was confusing at times! But still fun all the same. 2 little kids came and sat with me for a minute and wanted to take pictures on my camera. It was fun to watch how excited and happy they got when they took one picture. (If I could upload pictures from my phone to my blog I would, but they'll be on Facebook Friday!)

Today was so impacting. These kids just keep amazing me every second I am with them. Most of them are some of the most polite kids I've ever met. These kids are awesome. I don't want Friday to come. Keep praying for our trip. Thanks for reading about and following our trip so far!

Lesson #45: "Didn't you know Lincoln freed the slaves?!"

Today was the first day of our mission trip to Fort Worth. We're working with the Como Community Center here. We left this morning at 6:15, not-so-bright and early. Luckily our drive wasn't as long as our past trips (14, 16, 17 hour drives). We arrived at the community center and waited for the kids to arrive. We were exhausted, but extremely excited! We sang silly songs with them, and after about 5 songs we had to get out of our cool shells. (There were some kids who were not participating). We sang more songs, played different games, and just spent time with the kids. Today's project was working in the community garden. It was really interesting at times. But this was the perfect opportunity to get to know the kids early in the week. I met a girl who wants to be a singer, she's going to a performing arts school next year. I also met a little girl named Ananiah. She's so sweet and fun! After lunch we went and played more games with the kids until 3 whenever their parents came and got them.

Today was exhausting, but absolutely amazing! These kids are going to change my life this week. I am pumped.

Lesson #44: God is amazing!

This week we are going to the Fort Worth area for our Jr/Sr mission trip. I'm so looking forward to this opportunity! I'm excited to see what God has in store for us this week. Stay tuned for my daily posts this week!

Lesson #43: Little kids have way too much energy.

Today my Bible class went to go play with the kids on the playground. There's one little girl who has decided she wants to be my best friend. She probably has the most energy I have ever seen. I really miss having that much energy. Life was so simple in elementary, when all you had to argue over was who got the markers and who got the broken crayons.

I'm so ready for spring break.

Lesson #42: "You're not stupid, you're just wimpy."

I hate school sometimes. And lately, it's been all the time. In history, we've been studying the Holocaust. And on our essay portion of the test, one of the essays was to explain and apply this quote to our lives: "The only thing it takes for an evil man to succeed is for a good man to do nothing." This quote hit me. I've never thought so hard on an essay question before. How true is that statement? Its true enough to let Hitler kill millions of innocent people! It's true enough to allow bullies in schools! We, as Christians, need to stand up for everyone in need. If we stand by and do nothing, Satan will just get stronger and stronger. We absolutely can't let that happen. We are the good people, and we cannot let Satan win.

(To explain the title, my English teacher says the funniest things sometimes. Everyone was complaining today about a question on the quiz and someone mentioned how they were stupid, and she replied with, "You aren't stupid, you're just wimpy." I love her.)

Lesson #41: Study hall actually can help you.

I had zero homework this weekend. It was probably the best feeling in the world! This weekend was all about fun and relaxation. It was good to spend time with some of my favorite people in my life! I absolutely love weekends like this. Sadly, I don't get them very often.

Philippians 2:14, "Do everything without complaining or arguing." This is one of my favorite verses, but it's hard to follow sometimes. Being the week before Spring Break, all the teachers decide to pack as much as they can in this one week. (Which is not fair, because we DO have lives! Whether they think we do or not. Haha) It really is hard not to complain sometimes. I know, trust me. But honestly, there's a point when you really just need to stop. Because nobody likes hearing somebody complain about every little thing. It gets old. So let's be positive! No matter what our circumstance!

Use your study hall time. I think I'll start using mine a little more wisely from now on.

Lesson #40: It's beyond my control.

Do you ever feel like you have absolutely NO idea what you're here for? Why you were created? What your purpose is? Well, me too. I feel that way a lot, actually. But we all have a purpose, and that purpose is what? Well, it's different for everyone.

When I feel like I have no purpose, one verse always comes to mind. Jeremiah 29:11. It's a pretty well-known verse. "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.'" Doesn't that just give you some sort of sense of security? To know that God knows every plan he has for you? And for your future? God isn't just making this up as He goes. He's known forever what it is. So just trust him.

It's beyond our control.

Lesson #39: "True to ya heart, you must be true to ya heart..."

Be true to your heart, and yourself. Not everyone or everything around you. Don't try to just do things because it will please everyone else. Don't lie about things to make yourself seem better. It isn't worth it! If people can't accept you for who you are, then they DO NOT MATTER. "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." --Dr. Suess. So be who YOU are. Not who other people expect you to be. Live YOUR life.